Bar #50 Five O'Clock Lounge

One of the trademarks of the Lakewood dive bar is history. When you walk into one of them, they carry the wear, mementos and even the people from their decades of service. They have the layers of what made them unique from each generation that drank in their walls. One of our best examples of this in Lakewood is bar #50, 5 O'Clock Lounge.

The Five O'Clock Lounge is kind of amazing. The walls are adorned with neon signs, old pictures and music posters, and a piano. The booths, bar and stools are vintage and in great shape. There's a second room with a stage and pool table. The Five O'Clock Lounge feels the type of bar where punk or blues grew up. There is a large patio out back but permits have not made it through at the time of this blog for the allowance of drinking there.

The service was good. They were training a new bartender. There weren't any problems with her and their primary bartender was both knowledgeable and enthusiastic about good beer.

The beer selection was adequate. It was primarily domestic and cheap hipster beers but there were some nice options behind the bar. Normally, you'll be able to find a craft beer on tap as well.

There were some chips but they don't make food here.

We played their customized shuffle board game. We set up a poorly working game where we had three people playing but only two scores being kept. Whichever color slider you were using determined which team you were scoring for. It meant you might have scored the least points during the game but you could still be on the winning side in the end. Beer made that ok.

We went on a slow night where the stereo types of the bar stood out. As a dive bar requirement there was an old guy at the end of the bar. The rest of the patrons had tattoos and gauges. Everyone seemed friendly enough. I have found in my travels that the bars with the biggest jerks are the ones where the people are the closest to what society says they should look like.

The Five O'Clock Lounge is everything you want out of a dive bar. Your surroundings reflect the history that has passed through its doors, while celebrating what this bar is made for. The beer is the beer they want. The music is the music they want. The zombie walk that starts at the bar once or twice a year is the way they want it. The Five O'Clock Lounge is an unapologetic bar that has little it needs to be sorry for. The Five O'Clock Lounge is worth visiting and one you'll probably eagerly return to. Go check out Bar #50, don't worry they don't bite. Unless, that's what you want.

11904 Detroit Ave.

216-521-4906

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Bar #43 Madison's (Deceased)

Eventually, while traveling to all the bars you will run into the -ests. The bar with the best food. The loudest bar. The bar with the cheapest shots or the cheapest people. This week I went to what may be the diviest bar in Lakewood. I went to bar #43, Madison's, expecting just a dive bar but what I found was a family.

I entered Madison's, running late, expecting that Johnny would beat me there. He didn't, so, I was alone when I entered. Madison's is the kind of bar that could get completely quiet when a new person enters. Tonight was drunk old people night and they didn't care that I was there even as I stared blankly at everyone expecting to see another Every Bar in Lakewood shirt. Everyone was over the age of 55.

They didn't seem to have any beer taps but had an area where taps should be. So I started of with a bottle of Yuengling. They had a 2 for $3.50 deal going on all their domestic and bottom shelf beers. So my second beer was a Miller High Life. It seems the high life tastes like fizzy, slightly tinny, water.

How Miller High Life saved Johnny's Grandmother

Johnny's grandmother had gotten sick many years ago and needed emergency surgery. Due to allergies she was unable to handle anesthetics. She sent her husband across the street to get the only thing that was going to get her through the surgery, a six pack of Miller High Life. After chugging 4 or 5 of them down she called on the doctors. It was a success.  The operation still hurt but it never would have been able to happen if it weren't for her favorite beer.

Food includes bags of chips and free pretzel rods.

The bar took up two sides of Madison's room. Behind the bar was the beer, booze, a bunch of random stuff and a microwave. The room also had a tv, mp3 jukebox and table. Later we found a second room, it was mildly creepy because it's lights being off, showed signs of disuse and a sign naming it the Insane Asylum. Originally we thought that was a reference to the women's bathroom. It offered a pool table, dart boards and some old, awesome booths with pleather covering.

The crowd though drunk and old were very friendly. Throughout our time there various people came up to meet to us. A nice couple, Helen and Dave, enjoyed talking to us about their regular bar. There were two themes that were hit upon repeatedly while we were there.

The first was family. Their patrons know each other and over time care about each other. Madison's creates a comfortable environment to spend their evenings. They share their lives and become family. The family theme spread into the staff and ownership of Madison's as well. Lisa's, bartender, mom was in an issue of Nightlife and they had collected 30 issues for her. They showed the magazines off for years. The Madison family has also suffered a loss this year.

The second theme was change. The owner of Madison's passed away leaving the bar to his brother. As they say, with every ending comes a new beginning. Many are hopeful that Madison's future will brighten this year. Among possible changes that may come could be the opening of the second bar in the backroom. As much as Helen loves her friends at Madison's she is hopeful that changes will be coming that will bring in new options, new life and new customers to an old corner bar.

Lisa the bartender brings the same pride to her job that I've seen repeatedly at the so called dive bars. The pride of doing a good job, making her customers happy and showing them respect, along with pride in the business that she is part of is seen in her work. Lisa does not drink at work because it's disrespectful to her business and patrons. It is obvious that she cares about this bar.

Madison's is a dive bar. It's got a bunch of random stuff on the walls accumulated over the years. It serves your normal domestic beers plus a hand full of Great Lakes options. If you're hungry, they've got some random varieties of potato chips. What makes Madison's a bar worth visiting is everyone there, whether it be customer or staff, wants Madison's to be. We were welcomed by the people being paid to be their and the payers. They want their bar to be successful, to grow and, to bring in your business. This may not be the diviest bar but it may have been the most inviting. You should come check out bar #43, Madison's, they're waiting for you.

Real Life Hidden Picture Search:  Scuba Helmet, Ohio State Football, Alien, Thelma, Blue Car, Giant Stein,
British Chips, Victorian Booze, Robert Ebert, Elvis, Miller High Life, St. Pauli Girl, Mexican Bear, Indians

12401 Madison Ave.

216-226-9851

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Bar #38: Trio's Bar (Deceased)

Every city worth its weight has that dive bar whose exterior is so divey that you have to work just to figure out the name of that bar. Some of these bars have floors sticky with various unknown fluids and the majority of the patrons are either unconscious or have already stabbed you in the face. In other towns the bar's sign was simply blown off in a storm and never found its way back up. I found a sign in a window that said Trio's Bar and it was bar #38.

The first thing I noticed in Trio's was there's a bunch of cool stuff. (It's also, a lot bigger than expected.) They have a mixture of items that have sat in the bar's location for decades. Trio's was originally in Manja's location and then moved across the street when Cleeks was closing. Cleeks was a golf bar. There are antique golf items up on the walls, including a stakable chair and golf club head coat hooks. There also used to be 101 golf clubs up around the big mirror behind the bar. The bar also includes a strange golfer statue with a giant inflatable golf ball, a rotary pay phone, a wooden Indian, and a wall sized projection screen. They also have an awesome 70stastic juke box.

The music was only playing when people were using the juke box. Prior, the TV started us off with Jeopardy. Which continent do you think has the most UN countries? Then two older women took over and put on American Idol and Glee.

Hope you like cheap beer because that's what you're getting at Trios. I went with PBR because it was a buck and better on tap.

They don't have food so we walked over to Tai Hut; which I'm sure is good. I was tempted away by the Little Caesars in the distance and picked up my $5 preready peperoni pizza. Trio's provided paper plates for us.

The bartenders were both very helpful and full of information about the bar. I'm pretty sure they were also both a bit drunk by the time we left.

They have pool and darts. Dogs have been allowed inside the bar.

The answer was Africa.

Trio's was fun and has a good staff. Their beer is cheap and patrons friendly. The bar's clean, the patrons might not be. We all felt welcomed and wouldn't mind coming back again. Check out bar #38, Trio's, everything you want from a dive bar without the stuff you don't.

13362 Madison Ave

216-226-8828